12 Years Later

So, after the extensive (3 times the amount of blood given) I received a call from the hematologist.  Hoping it was to say that like in the past my numbers are back up as well as to tell me I didn’t need to undergo the bone marrow biopsy.  Nope!  My numbers (Platelets) were back up but he started going over the numbers fro IGA and some others that not only can’t I remember I couldn’t spell them if I did remember.  Shrugging it off thinking okay so all you have now is just more details on what has become a common occurrence.  Preface, I have never experienced anything like the horrors I have heard with the bone marrow test and the physical test does not scare me.  Holding my nerves in check I had to question the need for this test.  I explained how the last time I was admitted a bone marrow test was done, my condition really hasn’t changed so what the heck do they expect to find.  Well, I was not ready to hear what came next.  I was told that with CVID other blood conditions can occur then a bigger stunner was that they need to check for lymphoma.  Okay, I think I mentioned this episode in an earlier blog entry but, about 12 years ago I was going to get a routine rotator cuff procedure.  When the preliminary blood work was done I was told they would have to cancel the procedure and they started throwing around the terms lymphoma and Hodgkins versus non-Hodgkins.  I had my first bone marrow test then, one would assume they were looking specifically for lymphoma.  The biopsy returned no results so next they cut a lymphnode from under my arm (most physical pain I think I have ever dealt with), ten days later I was told that I had "Cat Scratch Fever" – I never did like the song.

So here I am again.  Just when I came to terms with my condition and trusted my doctors I get this.  I had a condition that I don’t like but I have learned to manage and quite frankly life has been pretty darn good.  None of it makes sense and is completely illogical in my uneducated opinion.  The trust, I should have been smarter I suppose, but it is proven wrong to trust.  I just don’t get it and it just reinforces when Doctors have a "practice" because they are obviously just practicing because they have no clue.  Sure I get it that I might have something called CVID which about 1 in every 50,000 of us has but I have been giving blood for several years, month at a time for awhile and then when it was logical the doctor changed the interval.  Then a relapse and all of the sudden the grim reaper has returned?

When all of the guinea pig tests are done and the smug arrogant doctors come back and say we don’t know this will all come down to the fact that this is the longest I have gone without being able to workout.  Stupid me, played a little hockey and "torqued" my arm and had to back off the workout regiment.  It’s just hard to tell what I am more of, mad or scared.


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